We interrupt our regularly scheduled program to bring you: the most unrealistic, yet kickass, shoes. Only from Report Signature.

I think the title of the post says it all.  I totally love Report's regular shoes because they are so deliciously cute and wearable, but lately I find my imagination held hostage by their higher-end line, Report Signature, which are probably the most UNwearable shoes I've ever seen in my life.  I couldn't wear them in a million years, because I would break my ankles in about five different places and dislocate both my knees trying to toddle down the stairs from my apartment.  


The shoes average a 4.5" - 5" heel.  Geez Louise, who can wear such an absurdly tall heel?  And yet, maybe the fact that they are so unattainable for the average gal makes them that much more awesome.  Is it even possible to make outstanding shoes like these but with, say, a 2" or 3" heel?  Sounds like a potential business plan...

From left to right: Madera platform, Howell bootie, Dita pump, Pamona platform, Rockwell platform, Tocai platform, Loring bootie, Durant bootie (in beige and leopard), Corinne sandal, Downey platform (in black and white), and Ziska sandal

Images taken from (in case you are crazy enough to want to buy them):

A Test of Efficiency/Efficacy: Diary of sh*t I bought in the last 4 months.

Posted simultenously to stephanie.posterous.com

I feel like I'm spilling all my secrets. 

Don't think for one minute that, with all my mooning about beautiful shoes and things, I somehow lose track or control of my spending or, as I've heard some people say, "have nothing to show for it."  Au contraire, I know exactly where every penny has gone and try to make purchases through careful deliberation (doesn't always work, of course).

I definitely make mistakes - I'm still a fledgling shopper, still learning the ropes, still buying things I regret later (or immediately).  I know it will take some time, but what I'm really working towards is developing my taste, my ability to quickly assess fit, style, quality, and value--understanding what I like and what I don't like, what works and what won't, slowly getting more confident making this assessment, and slowly becoming faster at it.  

I've come a long way in the last few years--it all started when I realized that I was a) buying pretty stuff I didn't wear and b) not wearing it out of laziness, defaulting to jeans and t-shirts, and, even worse, c) not wearing it because I lacked confidence/self esteem.  I realized I didn't wear half the stuff I bought because I did not like calling attention to myself.  I have been very lucky to have always worked in offices that allow a lot of room for creativity.  I realized that if I could work up the nerve to pull off some of the stuff I bought, and get used to the attention it would bring, perhaps that gumption would seep into other areas of my life.  I also realized that it would be fun to to approach style as another form of self-expression.  As Garry tells me, "wear it and hold your head up!"

I digress.

As I said, I keep close tabs on my credit card statement, the wad of receipts in my wallet, and the accumulation of "stuff" around my room.  I thought it might be a good exercise to do a recap/roundup of what I bought in the last few months, much of which you may have seen on this blog, along with my thoughts on each item.

April: Some may remember I gave up shopping for Lent.  As soon as Easter came, I bought stuff. A crapton of it.
  • Yellow bag: My first real-leather handbag.  From Marshall's. Besides being a steal, I use it almost every day.  Definite winner.
  • World According to Jess "crossword" case: It is a fantastic overnighter.  I love the separate compartment on the bottom for shoes.
  • Black hoodie, gray sweater, blue top from the Gap: The hoodie replaced one that was falling apart and will come in handy as soon as autumn hits.  The gray sweater I ruined in the dryer - but at least it was only $10 and may make some cozy armwarmers.  The blue top I absolutely love.
  • Shoshanna floral print dress: Huge mistake.  It is sized a true 4 (as opposed to the generous sizing at most chain stores), so I can't even zip it up.  I can't decide if I want to donate it, resell it, try to alter it to fit me, or lose a crapton of weight.
  • Franco Sarto clogs: I love them.  They were totally affordable, the grommets on the side add edge to any outfit, and they are so versatile!
  • RSVP silver sandals: They served their purpose (my friend's wedding).  At $13, does it really matter if I ever wear them again?
  • Frye lace-up boots: One of my most expensive shoe purchases to date.  I like them a lot, but still can't figure out how to wear them. (Help!)
May: This was a month of scouring eBay and traveling.
  • Cotton "tropical toile" sundress: I bought this dress from the fantastic Moule in the Pearl District of Portland, a fantastic purchase from an amazing retail store.  It was a one-of-a-kind sample, made either by Rachel Mara or Michelle Mason (the designer later decided to turn the design into a top instead of a dress).  It has a balloon-y silhouette, is light as air, and I love everything from the pattern of the toile to the black bands that define it at the top and bottom.  The icing on the cake was that it was heavily discounted, and there's no sales tax in Portland.  Score.
  • Black fedora: a random buy at the Saturday Market in Portland.  I like the way it looks/fits but have not figured out where on earth I can wear it with a straight face.
  • Vintage Selby loafers: From one of my favorite sellers on Etsy.  At $10 they were a steal, and I love the extra-long tongues and little gold hardware.
  • Vintage striped secretary blouse: It was also a steal, but it's a bit shapeless.  I need to figure out how to wear it without looking like a referee or a flight attendant.
  • Random jewelry: All purchased on eBay.  You all witnessed the deliberation over the owl, but the blue orchid was an unexpected find, and I was surprised at how much I love that splash of blue against everything.  The bracelets are fine, not super excited about them.
  • Custom pencil skirt from Louise Hedley: I was disappointed with the purchase and ended up giving the Etsy seller neutral feedback (she was very nice/lovely to work with but the color and fit was just not what I expected based on the item description).  Haven't worn it out but maybe one of these days.  Not worth the $ at all.
June: Showed a bit more restraint this month.
  • Plaid "farmer girl" shirt: I can't for the life of me remember the name of the designer even though I chatted with her for a few minutes at SF's Indie Mart.  She very cleverly cuts off the sleeves of things and arranges them in flower patterns on the chest.  I was debating between this and a vest made out of a repurposed blazer, but Garry was right that I would wear this more.  I do, and I love it!
  • Eva Brann cream crochet cardigan: It was the one thing I wanted to buy in all of Beacon Hill when I visited Boston last month.  The preppy, yacht-club style of New England does not jive with me.  I was surprised to find this unexpectedly romantic piece at Boutique Eskil.  It was expensive, but it's beautiful, you can't go wrong with a pretty white cardigan, and there's no sales tax in Boston.  Score.
July:  So far.  This does not include the sh*t I ordered last week from Anthro.  Including the enchanting dark bouquet dress.
  • Look from London plaid tights: The only thing at Jeremy's SF worth buying.  Sushmita and I thought Jeremy's was like a big, disorganized, and appallingly expensive version of Ross.  There were very few good deals to be had, and the selection was awful.  But I salvaged the day with this quirky find - they are super comfortable and lots of fun (and not pricey!).
  • Emily Katz "wish" top: One of the very few things I was moved to buy at the giant DIY flea market that was the Renegade Craft Fair.  Not only was this sample hugely discounted, but I got to chat with Emily herself for a while.  I'll be featuring her in a later post.
  • Elie Tahari snakeskin sandals: You already know all about this one.  They fit all right, but one major negative is that the slingback slips so easily off my heels.  I don't know if I should try to return them, if I just need to break them in, if I should get some kind of heel insert, or if I just need to totter around like a deer in them.

Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon

From Wikipedia:
 
"The Baader-Meinhof phenomenon occurs when a person, after having learned some (usually obscure) fact, word, phrase, or other item for the first time, encounters that item again, perhaps several times, shortly after having learned it. This is a specialized version of the effect of serendipity."
 
I read Stephanie's post on her Urban Outfitter "cage" type sandals in the early morning hours on Sunday. Later that day, I went to DSW and spotted, for the first time in my life, a real live pair of cage sandals. These ones by BCBG Paris. It's not unusual for fashions to come and go before I even know they exist, but I still thought it was a pretty Baader-Meinhoffy moment! Apologies for the phonecam photo.
 
By the way I did try on these sandals on, and they were ridiculously comfortable.

Not sure which trend I'm caving to...

Yes we're shoe-crazy here at wearability.  So is it a gladiator sandal, which I once called the trend that should die?  Or is it the more recent cage trend sparked by YSL's beauties?

I'm hoping these sandals I got from urbanoutfitters.com yesterday (in taupe, down to $39.00 from $58.00) are in a class all their own.  I'm looking forward to how comfy they look--hope there's still enough summer left for me to wear them.

Re-inventing silver sandals

Until I can afford to throw $900 on a pair of shoes, I suppose I'll make do with what I have, with a little creativity.

I got these silver sandals for a wedding for which I'm a bridesmaid.  Not wanting to break the bank, I got some nondescript RSVP sandals from 6pm.com for very little.  I was actually impressed with the quality - the soles are made out of leather, not rubber.  They were, though, a bit ho-hum.

Enter: Garry's signature studded belt, which he's worn to death over the last 1.5 years.  It finally fell apart and before he could throw it away, I confiscated it.  I found the studs easy to remove with a screwdriver, and even simpler to apply to the straps of these sandals...they fit perfectly, like they were made for each other. 

I definitely was not going for any specific pattern and eschewed symmetry in favor of a more "abstract expressionist" approach, just adding studs where they felt right.  I'm pretty happy with the result, and they'll be a nice surprise peeking out from under my formal dress.

Can you think of a better way to spend $900?

Ok so maybe a flight to Hong Kong might be worth more than these shoes.  But probably not - trips are temporary.  Shoes are forever.  I've been seeing the Yves Saint Laurent cage booties all over the magazines lately, but what really captures my heart are these sandal versions, with metallic leather and sweetly feminine velvet ribbons.  * melt *  

Originally priced at ~$1500, it looks like they are now on sale for $900!

Hot or Not? Expensive Designer Jellies

I can't quite decide if Tory Burch et al has created the most brilliant-nostalgic throwback to our little-girl days of carefree sunshine and outdoor frolicking, or if it should join the ranks of absurdly unnecessary things designed with one thing in mind: to rob us blind.

I'm guessing the latter.  Who out there's gonna pay $90 for plastic shoes, however cute (and some of them really aren't)?

Shoes on the brain.

I apologize in advance to the guys who probably don't care about this sort of stuff.
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I can't help it, I have shoes on the brain.  Until very recently, I was feeling quite guilty about the shoes I've been amassing over the last few years.  My dad would always flip out about how many I had.  But then I met a coworker who has an ENORMOUS shoe collection.  I didn't quite believe her, and was like, "how much could 'a lot of shoes' be?" The answer: almost 200 pairs.  And we're talking some serious shoes--Christian Louboutin, Manolos, etc.

Now I don't feel so bad about my paltry 24+ pairs of shoes, most of which I didn't pay more than $40-50 for (some as little as $15).  This means, of course, that I can buy more!  Whee.  Anyway, I could sure use some input from the style-minded:

1. I walked into Therapy on Castro St. today and tried on 'Ashlee' by REPORT.  $66 - 75. Loved them, but I can't decide which color to get: gray, black, tan, or cream?
2. My view of heeled oxfords went from shock/disgust, to grudging respect, and finally to fullblown lust.  Much like many a hollywood romance.  =) If I'm going to spend up to $100 on them tho, I want the perfect pair.  'Perfect' to me, means beautiful contrast detailing, well structured profile, and a heel less than 3".  I found all of these in 'Steppin' by Jeffrey Campbell, but they are $100.  Also found these nice little ones that are a little more modern.  And finally the pair I bought on sale at Nordstrom, 'Frost' by Me Too, for $60.  Which should I keep??
3. These next three sandals are about as close as I'll get to the abominable gladiator-sandal craze that has swept our fair cities.  The 'Athena' sandal from Urban Outfitters, and a twisted T-strap number (pink, or gold?), also from Urban Outfitters.
4. Some Jeffrey Campbell cutout heels that I probably won't get, but don't they look interesting?
5. My humble "wall" of shoes.